All posts tagged: winter blues

12 am thoughts – 2020 Wrap up

It’s about 20 minutes after midnight and I’m tired, very tired actually but not ready to sleep just yet. Do you ever just feel that heavy pressure, not quite anxiety level but just a steady pressure to fix your entire life in one day? I’m right there right now. Maybe it’s being spurred on by the upcoming end of the year and also end of the decade. Maybe it’s also being spurred on simultaneously by the fast approaching end of my 27th year. Just a moment ago (meaning literally as I began writing this) I started to dive deep into that trap of weighing all of my perceived lack of accomplishments of the past 365 days. I started to think about all of the ways I’ve failed myself, all of the ways I thought I’d be further than I am right now. This is why I opened my computer. I was going to whine about it in a pages doc and then delete it and hopefully go to bed feeling depressed enough to sleep (because …